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Photo by Bruno Delfino on Unsplash

When I started questioning certain aspects of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I knew one person I could safely talk about it with — my best friend who I already knew I could talk to about anything.

As I began sorting through my thoughts and could more readily define how I was feeling, that circle expanded to a couple more close friends — some active in the church, and some not.

I’m still here. Here are my thoughts on how we can create a safer space for people to experience uncertainties and ask questions.

I used to be afraid of becoming disillusioned with the church. Over the last couple of years, I’ve seen a number of incredible, mindful, brilliant individuals choose to leave the church. Many shared their decision on social media, noting how difficult it had been to make that decision to step away from the religion and beliefs that had been ingrained in them since childhood. They felt deep emotional pain — from the reasons they chose to leave, to the entire decision process, to the hurtful reactions of those around them. I didn’t want to go through that same pain. I ignored my questions for a long time. …


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Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

In a recent conversation with a close friend, she shared about a surprising revelation she recently received. While the revelation itself left her bewildered, she fully intended to act on it. “I just really think that God is having us rely on Him so much more,” she said. I agree completely.

Last year I decided to dissect my testimony, and to really examine the commandments and cultural practices I was a part of, as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS). That could be a whole post on its own, if I ever find the words to share everything I discovered. …


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Photo by Josh Applegate on Unsplash

A good friend of mine recently became angry with me because of differing views on a matter. It had been several weeks since we had even discussed that matter. His reaction was sudden and surprising. In retrospect, I doubt his anger could have stemmed solely from that one matter. I’m guessing that, as the weeks unfolded, he increasingly decided that I didn’t fit his vision of a good, righteous member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

In contrast, there’s my neighbor who, after reading my recently published memoir, stopped by just to tell me how grateful she was that I was willing to share my story so openly. She wrapped her arms around me and, with tears in her eyes, told me that she finally felt seen.


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Photo by Dapo Oni on Unsplash

Hi! Allie and Scott here. We created Share My Gospel to share stories, experiences, and testimonies of Latter-day Saints (and other Christians) around the world.

Share My Gospel is a home for Latter-day Saint Christians looking to share their faith, build their faith, and live their own faith better — all without walls around race, ethnicity, legal status, political party, sexual identity, homeland, disability, caste, age, or gender.

If you would like to write for Share My Gospel, please send a link to your article (published or draft) and any info you’d like to share with us to contribute@sharemygospel.org.

Please be aware of a few guidelines before you submit an…


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Photo by Artem Labunsky on Unsplash

Sometimes you need to walk away from a situation to overcome a certain hardship, but sometimes you can’t. Or you can’t walk away exactly when you’d like to.

And that’s where resilience is built.

In January of this year, I moved to a small town where I knew no one. My nearest friends and family members were 3+ hours away. I was having a hard time finding “my people” in this new town. It was also the dead of winter, and that brought its own emotional hardships.

I fought through several weeks of the deepest depression I had ever known before I finally began finding my footing in this new town. …


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Photo by Drew Coffman on Unsplash

It feels counter-intuitive to stop when you are in chaos. When there is stress on your shoulders that you can’t shake away. When it starts to get real.

For me, it’s the struggle of finding a job in the middle of a pandemic, when I don’t qualify for unemployment benefits and when my student loans are running out.

It’s getting real.

In the middle of watching YouTube videos about freelance opportunities, looking up jobs in different states, and trying to finish an assignment for class that is due soon, I had the thought to stop.

To honestly follow my own advice — what I would tell any friend, and what I have even written in a new personal development curriculum I authored — and stop. …


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Photo by Ezra Jeffrey-Comeau on Unsplash

Last week I published an article entitled “Get Over It: Why you should work through your trauma and stop self sabotaging.” In it, I share the experiences of two different people — a guy I briefly dated a few years back, and one of my best friends — and how they worked to overcome past relationship trauma. Earlier this year I published an article about my own trauma recovery and what that looked like.

I want to tell you where I am right now.

Today, recovery looks like taking care of myself first — filling my own cup. It means daily scripture study. It means exercising and remembering to drink enough water. It means keeping my room clean(ish). …


Why you should work through your trauma and stop self sabotaging

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Photo by KaLisa Veer on Unsplash

Years ago I went on a handful of dates with a very charming, fun guy. He had been married before, and that relationship ended badly — a fact he was very open about with me. Part of that story was his ex using his money to get breast enhancement surgery, then leaving him shortly after. While I enjoyed getting to know this guy, I was bewildered when he would anxiously say things like, “please don’t ever get a boob job,” or “I’d leave you immediately if you got a boob job” — a surgery I have never even considered getting. …


Letting go and enjoying the journey

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Photo by Ree on Pexels.com

I recently caught up with a long-time acquaintance of mine. Almost immediately he asked how my dating life was going. I replied that I had dated quite a bit over the last few years and nothing seemed to stick, but that I was okay with that. “Things will work out,” I said, then started sharing my career goals.

“It’s good to have a ‘Plan B,’” he kindly replied, referring to my career goals — but I was quick to respond, “No, this is my Plan A now.”

It felt like the perfect way to define the shift I had made in my thinking over the last few years, and how I now choose to focus more on the journey than the outcome. …


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Photo of the author by Ty Pew

I wrote this on June 1, 2018 when I was trying to decide whether or not to drop out of a half marathon I had been training for and had my heart set on for the last 6 months. I felt like I needed it today, so I pulled it out, dusted if off, and am sharing it here. Fun fact: I can’t even remember what breakup I was alluding to toward the end of the essay. It just goes to show that the best place we can be is in the present and that most things don’t really matter in the long run. …

About

Allie Barnes

Author, people person, aiming to do good. Christian/LDS. Find me on Instagram @lookslikewandering.

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